For whatever reason, since my last post, I've written many articles and decided to publish none of them. I think it was because the content was more factual than experiential, too much like writing a travel blog, which usually serves to only help people who are or will venture to the same places. As that was never the intended purpose of this blog, and although it has evolved and changed a bit since it's initiation, I feel better about publishing content that comes from the heart. Sometimes, when I'm just living, I'm not reflecting. Reflecting is a way of re-experiencing the past hopefully for an intended purpose. So it doesn't make sense to always be reflecting, only when necessary.
Today, I woke up and many changes are on the horizon for me, so I felt the need to put it to paper and finally get something published again.
After leaving the ashram in Goa, I considered my options and made a quick decision to head to the east coast, to Tamil Nadu, where there is a very strange and forward looking city-in-the-making called Auroville. I won't go in to too much detail, as I did already in an article that I decided not to post, so if you want to learn more, you can visit their website by putting a .org after the name. In short, it is a community of 2,400 people, 45% Indians and the rest representing 49 countries. At the moment, it consists of many different smaller projects and communities, and hopes to someday grow to be a city of 50,000. It is a vision held by a woman who was known as "the Mother," who was the spiritual side-kick of a political and spiritual giant of India's 20th century known as Sri Aurobindo. The whole place, though largely undeveloped, is unlike anything I've ever seen, especially the large golf-ball looking building at the center that is called the Matrimandir. Having gone inside last weekend for a limited access meditation session, I can easily say it is the most elegantly beautiful and serene building I've ever had the pleasure of visiting. It was like visiting the future, or boarding a spaceship, and the entire atmosphere surrounding the place is quite effective for calming the mind, which was the desired intention. It took around 40 years to build this thing, and the icing on the cake is the large crystal ball in the center of the structure which uses a beam of sunlight to light up the room. If you are ever in SE India, it's well worth it to come check this place out.
One of the projects in Auroville is where I've been staying for the past 2.5 weeks. It is a reforestation project called Sadhana Forest, which can aslo be found by putting a .org after the name, and is a volunteer based effort to plant trees and save a forest that was cut down to build the neighboring city of Pondicherry, which was a French colony. This community is also worth a mention, as it is quite developed and impressive, far from the hippie commune that we all tend to think of from the 60's or 70's. One thing that really separates this place from that model is that this is a completely sober environment. Volunteers can come and go in their free-time, but agree to refrain from using drugs, alcohol, and even tobacco on or off the premises, for the duration of their stay.
Not only that, but it is entirely vegan, so no animal products, or products that use animals for testing, are permitted. There are solar panels to provide all the energy, and a well to provide the water. We carry buckets of water to pour on our heads in outdoor stalls to take a shower, and of course, have to use a certain kind of soap. Clothes are washed on a large slab by rubbing another type of special soap and then using a brush to rub it in. Then, if you desire, you can windmill the article into the slab to slap out the water as you may have seen Indians doing on TV or in real life if you have been here. To use the bathroom, you have to squat down to hit a hole that is in the middle of a large lid that covers a huge 50 gallon barrel that is buried underground. If you need to pee at the same time, there is a little pan with a handle that you put in front of you. Believe me, it takes a couple days to master. After, you throw sawdust in the poo-hole, which after a year or so will become compost for planting trees, and dump your pee in a separate container that will be used to fertilize the banana trees. Pouring some water on your left hand, you wipe your bum with you bare hand, and then somehow manage to pull up your pants with your right hand, open the door with your right, and head out to he hand wash station.
There is a reason why Indians always use their right hand to eat.
The handwash stations, scattered around the community of roughly 50 structures and numerous pathways, are two tin cups screwed into a post. One holds a plastic bottle with a small hole in the lid. The other tin can is empty and has a small hole in the bottom of it. Next to every post is a large basin full of water, and some iodine for good measure. Using your right hand, you fill up a cup that sits on top of the basin and pour it in the empty tin cup on the post. As the water slowly runs out through the small hole in the bottom, you spray soap from the plastic bottle into your left hand and then give them a good wash. This way, they can avoid using running water here and also preserve the amount of water necessary for simple daily tasks.
At the moment, there are around 80 people in the community, but there was over 130 when I first got here. Every week, in addition to planting trees, volunteers are asked to help do various tasks to maintain the community, all of which are very organized and scheduled, and can also participate or lead community workshops in their free-time. There are always yoga classes on the weekends, people giving massage or dance classes, a weekly talent show, a weekly kirtan (deotional Hindu chanting), various forms of meditation groups, a weekly sharing meeting, and on Firdays, an eco-film club invities in people from Auroville to screen a documentary and serve food for up to 200 people. So the community is vibrant, with new people arriving all the time, and the weeks are jam packed with things to do.
I myself have really enjoyed being here, and looking back, understand that if I would have never left the ashram in Goa, I would have never had the time to come. Some of the people I've met here have really touched my life and many of them have plans to travel to Thailand next, so we will all be staying in touch. It's an experience I will never forget, and I will look to make a return visit in the upcoming years. It actually feels really good to work for free, together with other like-minded individuals, for a greater cause. But I know that we as humans are more selfish than that. We come here to hang out in a commune painted with thatched huts, where spontaneous jam sessions and intelligent conversations are around every corner. We all come for an experience, and that is exactly what we get.
Another thing we get, is sick. Almost everyone here gets sick, and it finally happened to me a few days ago. Not only did I get the stomach thing, but it was also accompanied by a really high fever. I was wrapped in two thick wool blankets during the hot day (it gets quite cold here at night), and I was shivering as if I was back in Alaska. I kept coming in and out of this world and another one, trapped between being awake and dreaming. When I would wake up, I usually had no recollection of where I was, and I'd just sort of roll around in agony until going back into another nightmare. Eventually, the team of ladies here that work in the healing hut, suggested that I visit the local hospital. I had a friend go with me, and we spent most of the day and a night in a private room with nurses in and out to check on me. I didn't really care how much it cost me, the fact that it had an attached bathroom with a toilet was worth any price in my condition. 22 of the 32 times that I had what they were calling a "loose motion," were in that hospital, and I can't imagine having to squat over that small holed lid that many times back here in Sadhana Forest.
But being sick, like everything else, is all just part of the ride. One minute's agony is the next minute's source of comedy. Besides, getting sick in India is something that you almost want to happen early, so you can get it over with. Now that I am almost completely recovered, I feel like I've been reborn, and I am taking this new life as a chance to take advantage of what I'm being led to do. I have many ideas, most of which are my own, but another one was just presented to me, through chance or some sort of divine intervention, and I am keen to pick up on the hint.
After finishing reading an autobiography about the spiritual leader in India known as "Amma," which means mother (but not to be confused with "the Mother"), I went back to the community library to look for another book. I usually pick my books naturally, by what I feel drawn to, rather than by what my mind desires to read next. Yesterday, I put the Amma book back, scanned the books, and reached for the first one that was calling me. To my surprise, it was the exact same book that I had just read, but with a different cover design! The spine of the book didn't indicate the title, so there was no way I could have known it was the same book. Thinking it strange that I picked that book out of the couple hundred books in the library, I put it back and picked another, called "Sacred Journey." When I pulled the book out, lo and behold, the cover was a giant picture of Amma. To me, this was almost scary, and my reaction was to shove it back and find another book.
After running to the bathroom for a bit of residual internal cleansing, I went back to the library and picked up the Sacred Journey book again. If I am supposed to be open to the universe providing me guidance, it would be hard to discredit the signs I had been given. So I went to the wi-fi section of the main hut and checked Amma's schedule. She will be in the general area of India that I am in later in the week, and now I know, I must go. So my stay here at this community will be cut a bit shorter than expected, but I am incredibly grateful for the wonderful platform that it has been for me to regroup, refocus, and find the next step of my journey in this crazy world.
I've thoroughly enjoyed my time here, resting, reading, meditating, doing yoga, and making new friends. I've enjoyed working with my hands in the kitchen and planting trees in the earth. And, I've even taken the opportunity to reserve a spot for an upcoming yoga teacher training course in March in Rishikesh, which will be at the tail end of my stay in India and complete the original purpose for my travels here. Before I got sick, I spent a week doing a raw food diet experiment and was waking up early to lead a 5am meditation group. The experiment, if nothing else, helped me shed a few extra pounds and really put me in touch with all the desire and craving that surrounds food in my life. There's no way I could have planned for things to unfold in this way, and I am learning to rest in this uncertainty and the beauty that follows.
Although I like to entertain ideas and utopian ideals, I'm also realistic and honest enough to see that they're often not grounded in reality. I believe in the good-natured essence of humanity, but I also see that this essence is covered up with selfishness, laziness, and greed. If there is no reward for the the work, and there is no one to enforce it, many people try to slide under the radar and not live up their responsibilities. So I have taken this opportunity to be still and observe.
I've observed myself in all the ways I have both jumped at the many opportunities to help and also stayed in the shadows, not wanting to do more than I am expected to. I've noticed all the times my mind has judged others for their actions, and the tendency to see myself as different than them. I've noticed others, both reaching out to lend a helping hand and sitting idle, not wanting to give up a weekend to help out a sick person. As I understand it, and as taught by saints and sages around the world for thousands of years, we must do the work to shed these layers that separate us from others and put us first. That work can come in many forms, but in general, it includes some sort of spiritual practice such as meditation, in order to identify the problems and create the space in our lives in which to let go of them.
So as much as this place is really amazing and the people here are inspiring, I feel that no place is going to be perfect, and that at the end of the day, I remain alone in this world. I don't relate to anyone with everything, and living in a community of mostly like-minded individuals really has served to make that clear to me. My journey will continue, leading me to new places and experiences, and I can only hope that they prove to be half as meaningful as this stage of my journey has been. All in all, I couldn't have asked for a better experience, and I see all the things that had to go right, or wrong, to allow me to be here. When one door closes, another opens, and I'm really starting to see that all things that come my way have their own importance, even though they may first appear as negative. I am feeling rested, inspired, healthy, and prepared to head out into the busy world, in search for a little bit of inner peace. Thanks for listening!
No comments:
Post a Comment